Hello! Here’s a video I made with Matthew Brian Cohen, a parody of those house-flipping shows. We show you how you can make money by flipping LITERALLY ANYTHING that you find on the street.
It was shot by the incredibly talented Colin Elzie and edited the also incredibly talented Steve Thompson. Matt and I have been working on versions of these characters for a while and we love playing them.
Matt lives in in LA now so no one knows how to get in touch with him, but if you could, I believe he’d say that he hopes you find this funny and that you share it and stuff. Thanks!
Teaser clip for my upcoming OLYMPIC INTERVIEW SPECIAL with actual journalist Sal Gentile.
I predict that Sal is going to win a Pulitzer Prize for this interview.
I think this preview clip pretty accurately sums up my interview with aspiring Olympian Connor Ratliff. However, I will admit, after covering Connor’s supposed “presidential campaign” for months and being stonewalled at every turn, this new interview is actually the most revealing exchange I’ve ever conducted with him. I’m interested to see the final product.
Connor’s prediction that I will win a Pulitzer is completely unfounded and has no basis in reality.
Hello! Here is a video I wrote and acted in that was directed by Colin Elzie and edited by Dylan Snowden. It’s about a man named Terry Studge who is running for Best Actor at the Oscars and he would like you to vote for him. There’s one week left to vote so spread the word! Terry has never been in a movie in his life. But he is the founder of popular dog dating website dogdates.com!
Please watch and like and share if you’re into it. The thumbnail for this video is horrendous but I like that.
If you’ve been on Twitter today you might be wondering why the name “Jack Morris” is trending nationally.
Jack Morris is a former pitcher for the Detroit Tigers, one of that team’s most notable players who pitched for them for the entirety of the 1980s. He’s a five-time All Star who won over 250 games and four World Series, including in 1991, when he pitched a herculean 10 scoreless innings and led the Twins to a Game 7 victory in what is widely regarded as one of the greatest World Series of all time.
This week, the baseball writers will decide whether to induct new players into the baseball Hall of Fame, and it’s Morris’s last year of eligibility. For a long time, Morris was considered by many a shoe-in Hall of Famer. He was an iconic pitcher who accomplished a number of feats that were quite rare in his time and even rarer now. The last two pitchers to pitch 10 scoreless innings in a single game were separated by a full seven years. Essentially, that is something that happens once or twice a decade.
Then came the statistical revolution, and popular opinion changed. Perhaps for good reason. There were always a number of glaring flaws in the case for Morris as a Hall of Famer. For one thing, he gave up more hits, earned runs (a misleading statistic, but important nonetheless) and more home runs than any other pitcher in the 1980s. His ERA+, an advanced metric designed to correct some of the deficiencies of the traditional ERA, is 105, meaning his ERA was just 5 percent better than the league average for his career, nowhere near Hall of Fame standards.
Those who argue in Morris’s favor will you remind you that he also won more games than any other pitcher in the entirety of the 1980s, and there were a few seasons where he struck out 200 batters and won 20 games, too. He was a battler and a workhorse, a power pitcher who relied on speed and a nasty slider. And perhaps most important of all, he conjures fond memories of a bygone but not-too-distant era. When you think of baseball in the 1980s, you think of Jack Morris.
I’m as firm a believer in the value of empirical evidence and advanced metrics as anyone else. When statheads championed the cause of Bert Blyleven — the half-remembered journeyman who wound his way through the ’70s and ’80s before receding into history, only to be revived by a devoted admirer who waged a one-man crusade to get him into Cooperstown — I supported them. If anything, Morris is the opposite of Blyleven, an iconic pitcher revealed by statistics to be less than what we thought.
But I’m not sure we should care all that much. It is, after all, the Hall of Fame. “Fame” is an intangible quality that eludes our best statistical instruments. It frustrates our attempts to systematize. We could, of course, alter the meaning and purpose of the Hall of Fame, but I’m not sure we should. The Hall of Empirical Evidence would, I think, be far less useful, and certainly less fun. Cooperstown isn’t merely a list of the best and worst baseball players; it is a museum, a receptacle for artifacts, totems that symbolize and remind us of our past, of those who came before us.
So why not let Jack Morris into the Hall of Fame? His name would be there less to signify his talent as an individual baseball player and more to remind us of the era in which he played. To remind us of the forkball and wild pitches, the 1980s and 10-inning games, spectacular feats and astonishing moments, one of the greatest World Series in the history of the game. Jack Morris was there for it all, a main character in the Dramatis Personae of baseball, in that period which, as time passes, will be harder and harder to recall.
Hey friends! Dylan Snowden wrote, and I acted in, this very bizarre video in which I invite members of the JFK High School Class of 2001 to a reunion this weekend even though I did not go to JFK High School and I’ve never been to Sacramento.
Dave Bluvband did a great job shooting it and it’s very weird and if you could watch it and like it and share it that’d be great! And if you know anyone who graduated from JFK High School in Sacramento in 2001, invite them!
Will Hines is and forever will be a vital part of the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater. He is a man that dedicated a lot of his time and passion to help foster and develop young talent through the UCB Training Center. He is also arguably one of the best improvisers, writers, and directors at the…
This is the best.
I can’t help but add my own personal reflection, and there is so much I could and would like to say, but I will merely say this: If I hadn’t taken 401 with Will Hines in December 2010 I almost certainly would not be as involved in this community as I am today. My life would be considerably different, and almost certainly less interesting, less creatively fulfilling, less weird and joyful and rewarding. I might not even be a comedian. I probably would have given up.
And I am one of only hundreds — literally hundreds and hundreds — of people who can say that.
First page: Margaret and her sister Ethel discuss starting a revolution via Margaret’s newspaper “Woman Rebel.”
Second page: Margaret discusses Eugenics movement — sterilizing people (anti-Sanger’s try, still, to portray her as being in favor of sterilizing —- she wasn’t really, except if people volunteered to as a manner of birth control if they were destitute or sick).
Couldn’t upload the page where: Sanger picks up dudes! Here she turns on HG Wells, runs across a current lover and then meets a sexologist she’s instantly obsessed with.
You can go to Midtown Comics right now and buy this just like I did last night. They have at least one more copy left.